Hard to believe....

I can't believe this was JayDee 3 years ago. Looking back, it seems like just a bad dream. I still get teary eyed whenever I think of how strong JD was. This little boy went through so much in just one year. I know without a doubt that we were able to cope with this because of the prayers of our family and friends. I am so grateful for our Savior and for the gospel. I have a strong testimony and I know that Heavenly Father loves each one of us and he wants us to be happy. Whatever hard times you may be going through, just remember it will pass. Also, it can ALWAYS be worse! Our trials strengthen us and define who we are. Rely on Jesus, he will make your burden lighter. I promise you that. JD is doing great. The only two things that have affected him are: he is deaf in his right ear. They removed his ear drum. And his right eye does not produce tears. When he cries, his left side gets red and his tears stream down the one side. I am going to have him learn sign language. He does great in school and we love him so much! I just re-posted what I typed when all of this was happening. JD had a lot of pressure and build up of spinal fluid (CSF) you can see how swollen his head is. After surgery, his face was so swollen he could barely open his eyes. He loved this Spider-Man. Those stupid stitches make my stomach turn. He had CSF built up in his stomach here too. Sept 2, 2007 HERE WE ARE AGAIN AT PRIMARY CHILDREN'S. THEY ARE REALLY GOOD HERE. THEY TREAT THE KIDS VERY WELL AND TRY TO KEEP THEM ENTERTAINED. JD HAD CEREBRAL SPINAL FLUID DRAINING FROM HIS EAR (CSF) AND WE WENT TO THE ER IN ST. GEORGE YESTERDAY AND FOUND OUT IT WAS CSF FOR SURE AND THEN THE DOCS AT PCMC TOLD US TO DRIVE HERE AND SO WE GOT HERE AT 2:30 A.M. WE ARE WAITING TO HEAR WHEN THE SURGERY WILL BE NOW. THEY ARE MOVING IT UP. JD CAN GET MENINGITIS WHICH CAN BE DEADLY AND SO HE IS ON AN IV WITH HEAVY ANTIBIOTICS. HE IS FINE. ACTING HIS NORMAL SELF. GOOD THING WE HAVE FAM HERE TO HELP US! I WILL POST WHEN WE FIND OUT MORE. THANKS FOR THE THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS. LOVE, THE CLUFF FAM Sept 8, 2007 My sweet lil boy My heart aches for JD. He is still in the hospital. They did another surgery today. They put a shunt in his head which is a tube that runs under his skin from the top of his head down to his stomach. It drains the spinal fluid to his stomach. His swelling has only gotten worse, his head is so big and his body is not absorbing the fluid like it is suppose to. So I hope that this one works and nothing else will need to be done. He has had two different leaks from his back where the lumbar drain was. They took out the drain on Thursday. He had to lay flat for 4 hours and my mom and Jordan and myself took JD to the toy room upstairs. He didn't want to stay very long, he wasn't feeling good. Then the next morning at 2:45 he was moaning and I got up to check on him and he was soaking wet. His sheets were drenched and it felt like ice water- his teeth were chattering and he had a fever. Josh was in St.George at the time so I called my mom and asked her and my dad to come and give JD a blessing. My aunt Shay and uncle Frank came to give him a blessing too. The priesthood is amazing! We are so blessed to have worthy family members to give blessings. My dad gave JD a blessing and uncle Frank gave me a blessing. They were both very nice blessings. After that, they took JD's stitches out of his back and put a new one in. All of this is done only by numbing his back and they took too long to come stitch him so I think the stuff was already almost worn off. This was the 2nd time in less than 24 hours. JD is in such pain when they do this, I couldn't help but cry and try to comfort him at the same time. (Both times) Just to see his eyes wide open and he is screaming at the top of his lungs and he is sweating really bad because he hurts so much. It just tears my heart. I wish so badly I could take the pain for him. JD leaked from his back again today too, just before surgery. Luckily they were able to re-stitch it when he was out of it for his surgery. I could not handle watching him go through that one more time. He is so tired and yet so strong. He amazes me. I know that Heavenly Father and Jesus are helping our family and they are with JD while he endures this. Hopefully all goes well and we can go home Tues. Although, we will stay at my moms house for the rest of the week because Josh is leaving for New Hampshire this Thurs. And that way the docs can check on him later this week. I hope and pray this is the end of it all. (besides taking the shunt out later). I don't know how much more I can handle. It could still be worse though, I count my many blessings. thank you for your love and support. love, DeAnna Sep 21, 2007 (pictures are at top of post)THESE PICTURES OF JAYDEE START FROM THE DAY OF SURGERY AUG. 31ST UNTIL WHEN WE LEFT AND STAYED AT MY PARENT'S HOUSE ON SEPT 11TH. IT WAS A VERY LONG 11 DAYS. THE LAST PIC IS OF J.D.'S STOMACH. HIS SHUNT ENDS THERE AND YOU CAN SEE THE SWELLING FROM THE SPINAL FLUID. IT IS NOW JUST A SMALL BUMP, IT LOOKS A LOT BETTER.WE ARE SO GLAD TO BE HOME. J.D. TOLD ME TODAY-MOM, I AM HAPPY TO BE HOME. I TOLD HIM SO AM I. NOW IF WE COULD JUST GET JOSH HOME. HE HAS BEEN IN NEW HAMPSHIRE SINCE BEFORE WE GOT OUT AND NOW HE IS IN NEW YORK UNTIL SAT. WE MISS HIM!! MY FAMILY IS HERE WITH ME RIGHT NOW UNTIL SAT. IT IS NICE TO HAVE SO MUCH HELP. THANKS MOM AND DAD LOVE YOU SO MUCH!J.D. IS DOING MUCH BETTER. THE SHUNT HELPED A LOT. HE HASN'T HAD ANY MORE SWELLING WHICH IS SO GOOD. HE HAS ANOTHER CAT SCAN AND CHECK UP IN 2 WEEKS. WISH US LUCK! THANKS EVERYONE FOR YOUR PRAYERS. THEY HELPED US GET THROUGH ALL OF THIS.